#selfcare for everyone

Hello dear reader, it’s been a while! The busyness of summer is coming to an end, and the busyness of back to school is in full swing! This is the first September in 21 years that I am not heading back to school, and I have to admit, it’s odd. Normally, back to school forces us into a new routine – we must change our schedules, re-evaluate habits, and set goals for the new (school) year. So, even though I’m not headed back to school, I am taking stock of my habits, re-affirming my goals, and taking time to invest in my best self!

Last time, Jen talked about two of the cornerstones of self-care – diet and exercise. These are two forms of what is sometimes called “active self-care” – things that we must actively choose to do and commit to, in order to take care of our mental and physical health. Healthy meals will not magically appear on your plate, and exercise requires consistent investments of time and effort. These two pieces are something I have struggled with over the years, but this month I am finding a renewed energy, giving just a little bit more in each workout, and being more conscious of what I fuel my body with.

In the age of Instagram, #selfcare has been co opted and commercialized, especially for us women. We are sold green smoothies and early morning yoga classes, bath bombs and fancy face masks – always enticed to splurge in the name of treating ourselves. Now, don’t get me wrong, I love carving out time for some intentional and luxurious skin care, and I had a green smoothie earlier today. But don’t let the 19.3 million instagram #selfcare posts fool you – self-care needn’t be glamorous. Sometimes it looks like throwing on those old workout clothes and dragging your butt to the gym with smoothie in hand, and sometimes its a baggy sweater, a glass of wine, and Netflix with your favourite person.

Above all else, listen to yourself and your body, and trust that it knows what it needs – be that stricter routines, or a relaxation of the rules. You are the only person who can define what kind of self-care you need to engage in each day – but please dear reader, take care of yourself.

Caring for Self makes for a super September!

Well now where has summer gone?!? Here we are welcoming September and all that the promise of “getting back at it” brings. This time of year is chock full of potential and the thrill of planning. Many of my family and friends see this as the true and practical start of a new year and an apropos time to get back to doing things that matter and making the changes that will enhance and enrich our lives. With this in mind, Meg and I thought making self-care a priority in September was fitting for both of us. The foundation of everything we endeavor to do and accomplish rests on the strength we possess in ourselves, and this month we are focused on cultivating joy through actively caring for ourselves and nurturing that strength.

For me, the month ahead will involve setting a couple of personal, health related goals to take where I am at on my journey to a more joyful life to the next level….stay tuned for all the ‘deets’ on this. Ever since Meg and I had our January Jam session, I have found that setting a specific goal and bringing my Jen Taylor passion to it has allowed me to achieve some things I did not think possible. I have never seen myself as athletic – and yet since January I have joined the Y which allows me to swim and work out, I have walked so many steps – both on pavement and through many lovely nearby trails. And as of 2 weeks ago, I tried Urban Poling to up my game when walking. Do I look like an athlete? Not sure about that, but damn I feel like one for the first time in my life, and feeling is believing! This activity, combined with engaging a registered dietician to help me create a healthy and balanced eating plan, has helped me see myself as a healthy eater with vitality and joy inside and out (good food tastes great, and when you know what you are eating is keeping inflammation and disease at bay, it’s not hard to stay the course!)

Of course, healthy eating and exercise are just a couple important facets of self care – I have also planned some of the more practical “to-do” self care items – dentist next week, new eye glasses with my new prescription, a haircut, etc – these things can sometimes feel like a chore, but they are important in helping me to look and feel my best!

Stay tuned for a post on what Self-care September looks like for Meg…

Jetsetting June

Hello again dear reader…here we are in June and we are pleased to be checking in to share the joy that a mini break or a vacation can bring you. Meg and I both planned to jet away somewhere in June and we both agree that in our quest to live in the moment as well as to find joy in the everyday things, getting away from life’s routines is a great way to re-activate our senses and feel joy.

For me, the planning and anticipating is as joyful as the actual vacation – I get excited sharing with people that I am heading away and talking about my planned activities. The opportunity to share and have those around you share their experiences is a real bonding moment. Shared joy is terrific! It goes without saying that the part when you finally arrive and hunker down for fun, relaxation or whatever the destination you have chosen prompts you to do is the ultimate moment. That big happy sigh that you have arrived.

Well earlier this month I was able to get away for a mini break in New York City with my family – my husband, two adult children and my son’s girlfriend. The first thing I must share is how incredibly grateful I feel that I can get the time and have the means to take vacations. This sense of gratitude stays with me throughout my time away and I often pause and think about how blessed I am. Especially in a city that offers every conceivable pleasure…shopping, shows, eating, seeing…you name it. We did it. An actionpacked couple of days clocking in 20,000+ steps a day…and the moments that brought me the most joy were the ones when we were acknowledging the fun and enjoyment we were experiencing together. The joy from picking a great place to eat and having some laughs together as we celebrate the food we are enjoying. Or when you decide to forego a plan and spontaneously attend something you didn’t expect you would – like on Saturday when my daughter happened upon an ad for a Plant Based Expo going on in NYC the very Saturday we were there and it was open to community members – and we went together! While there we spotted Dr Gregor of How Not to Die and we felt giddy – knowing how much we have learned from him and the beauty of the Daily Dozen. The best!

All this to say that I also always feel joy when we arrive home safe and re-energized and our awesome puppies are waiting for us. When you look and are open to it – there is much in life to celebrate. This would be the lesson I continue to learn…life has many challenges and you cannot always predict what is ahead – however by making the decision to be open and to have the willingness to put forth the effort you can also ensure that when the joyous moments occur you are ready to savour them and feel the joy that life is good!

Mashup May

This month, we had a few things that we wanted to talk about, so instead of picking just one topic, we are doing…(drumroll please)….MASHUP MAY! And the intro to this mashup? Why, music of course!

This past month, I had the great privilege of playing in the orchestra for a high school production of Beauty and the Beast. After countless hours of rehearsals, the show ran last week – 8 performances in 5 days, a few lost voices on the actors’ parts, and some serious calluses on my fingers – it’s all over, but the memories will live on.

When orchestra rehearsals began back in April, I was excited, albeit nervous to be playing my bass again. As the hours went on and the music wormed itself permanently into my consciousness, I was reminded once again of the joy of playing a musical instrument. If you’re lucky, that instrument starts to feel more like an extension of your body than something separate from it; the music not notes on a page, but a beat pulsing through your veins.

Once the orchestra and the cast started working together, though, that is where the real magic began. Many people enjoy a night out at the theatre, but few get the privilege of being in the theatre, bringing the performance to life. I was in awe at the talent of these young people – their singing, dancing, and comedic timing was far beyond their years, and they worked so hard to make this show the success that it was.

As any performer knows, rehearsals can be long and gruelling, but the sheer joy of sharing that hard work with an audience is unparalleled – and a standing ovation? Well, there’s simply nothing like it.

Active April

Meg:

Hello, dear reader! Sorry it has been so long. This month, we had planned to talk about the importance of being active. I had a whole spiel prepared about the benefits of exercise for your health (physical and mental), and the joy of pushing yourself to new limits. Most people have probably given up on or forgotten about their new year’s resolutions by now, and I was ready to make an impassioned case that “Movement is Medicine”.

Ironically though, I have been so busy with activities this month that I haven’t had any time to write about our theme of “Active April”! Life seems to get busier and busier as the days get longer, and this transition into spring is actually bringing me a lot of joy, even if I haven’t had much time to reflect on it.

Jen:

I’m in the same boat as Meg – life’s pace has picked up as the light of day sticks around longer. I was out every evening last week with different activities and commitments, and as I reflect now it is the activity that speaks to my heart that has the biggest impact on my sense of purpose and sense of joy.

The reality is that activity and being busy is not the secret – its saying yes to the activities that serve my health and heart, and having the strength to say no when this is not the case. I attended a performance of Mamma Mia and the movement in my mind, heart and feet was the best proof that being active when we choose the activity thoughtfully is the ‘name of the game’.

We have tossed around ideas on what May might mean to us….perhaps May is a month to celebrate music and the joy it brings to us…perhaps we will take another stab at meditating. Stay tuned as we move in an active way from April into May.

March Meditation

And just like that, we are more than halfway through the month of March! Our month of focusing on food flew by, and we’re onto a new focus this month – meditation! Of course, every day we are trying to be more intentional about the choices we make, and perhaps March’s focus on meditation will help us along this journey.

So why meditation? This year we are trying to find more joy by doing things that are good for us, and both ancient wisdom and modern research indicate that a regular meditation practice is beneficial – so we’re putting it to the test.

Ahhh….deep breath in and slowly exhaling….

I have spent the past two weeks pondering the reason why I want to restart a practice of meditation. The simple answer is that I know it will provide many therapeutic benefits…. the more complex reality is that I struggle every day with the constant chatter and churn of thoughts that run through my mind, and facing this in a real way can feel scary and somewhat bigger than me. Not to mention that it can feel like another ‘to do’.

A few years back guided meditation helped me gain the peace in my heart and mind to make a significant decision about a career move. I am incredibly grateful that I was introduced to meditation when I needed it so desperately. I had a special friend teach me and support me. The ability to quiet the mind, to reflect more authentically on how I am feeling about truly important matters in life – not the seemingly urgent every day matters that can block out the joy and create a barrier to the way we want to live our life – is a skill requiring patience and readiness. It may be this readiness I am struggling with right now.

Meg and I both find insight from reading and learning from others, and so Sit Like A Buddha – A Pocket Guide to Meditation by Lodro Rinzler seemed a perfect resource this month. One of the first messages in this guide is that a meditation practice is hard. Being clear on what is motivating the desire to meditate is essential. I find myself at another crossroad in my life, and I am motivated by the idea that an open heart and clear mind are the foundations required to make key decisions where you are able to take the next step with confidence and courage.

So that is why we are focusing on meditation this month. To open our hearts, clear our minds, and be able to step forward into a life with even more joy.

Lessons Learning… Part II

Last week, Jen shared her journey with food, and how she is learning to find joy in a new, healthier way of eating. This week, I’m sharing my story…

4 years ago, I took a course as part of my Geography Major entitled “Global Agriculture and Food Systems”, where we learned about the intricacies and injustices of food production and distribution in our globalized world. It was the first time in my life that I really started to think critically about the role of food in our lives – not just as a determinant of individual human health, but also how it affected the health of our Earth, and the wellbeing of both the humans and animals involved in feeding a planet of over 7 billion people. I began to realize that my decision to eat a hamburger and fries for lunch had ramifications beyond the $8.50 charge on my Visa.

Armed with this new knowledge and a fire in my belly, I decided to go vegan. To my 20 year old mind, it was the only logical choice. I stayed vegan for 2 years, and on the outside, most people would have assumed that I was the healthiest I’d ever been – certainly I was the skinniest! But on the inside, I was suffering. The constant weight of reading ingredient labels, often skipping meals because there was nothing vegan available, and having to fend for myself at home while the rest of my family shared a meal – it was exhausting, and I was miserable.

Then, one fine summer day up at the cottage, I decided to join my mum in a snack of crackers and cheese. And suddenly, the weight began to lift off my shoulders. The next day, we all indulged in ice cream cones and watched the sun go down together – I remember it so fondly – and I suddenly realized what I had to do. I knew all the arguments in favour of veganism, but I finally came to terms with the fact that it just wasn’t right for me – the toll it took on my mind and body far outweighed any benefits.

And so today, my diet looks different. I still eat a mostly plant-based diet while at home, because I enjoy it and because I know it is a healthy choice for myself and the planet. But I also allow myself to eat some dairy, eggs, and occasionally fish, because I know that is a healthy choice for my mind. It took some time, and some trial and error, but I feel like I have finally found a balanced way of eating that works for me.

I am still a big proponent of eating a plant-focused diet – the research speaks volumes (see How Not To Die, NutritionFacts.org, The Planetary Health Diet) – but I know that I can only truly speak about my own experience, and everyone must make the choices that are best for themselves and their families individually.

To anyone reading this – I hope that you will make good choices. I hope that you will find your balance. But mostly, I hope that you, dear reader, will find joy in what you eat.

Lessons learning…

Last week we talked about the reasons we wanted to focus on food this month. This week & next, we’re talking about what that looks like in practice – the books we’re reading, the foods we’re eating, and the choices we’re making on our journey to more joy and overall health, both physical and mental.

Jen’s Journey:

A year ago I purchased a book from a charity book sale table for $2 called Younger Next Year… with its bright yellow cover and a promise of health and vitality – I was intrigued. It took more than a year before I actually read the book – and wow I am thrilled I finally did! Now that I am in my 50’s, the idea of being younger next year is very appealing to me. How can I stay 50 for the next 20 years? Well the book made a clear and solid promise that if I exercise every day and don’t eat crap, I could achieve this worthwhile pursuit of healthier living (of course there is more good stuff in the book – as well as the message that although worth the effort, it is not easy!)

Ultimately what resonated with me is the simplicity of the “rules” presented. I can manage the idea of “Don’t eat crap” on a day by day basis, and I am astute enough to differentiate what is and isn’t crap. Hence 2019 has started out strong, both in that I have joined the gym and am exercising daily, and of course finding my way in terms of daily food choices. Having February’s theme be food, I am engaged in the delight of digging deeper into how I can take my knowledge beyond just surface level through my love of reading and learning.

In comes How Not to Die – a wonderfully in depth book chock-full of information on how the right foods can save you from disease and early death. Wow again! The challenge I face with heavy material like this is that it oftens leaves me with more questions on how to take what I am learning and put it into practice – is it possible given 50 years of eating experience to change so much? No meat, no milk, so many no’s! While I am happy to be learning more about how to eat optimally, this information overload ultimately brought me back to the beauty of simplicity – simple guidelines at the start of a life changing journey feel right.

I am learning lessons everyday – some truly bring joy – like an amazing meal that nourishes the body and the mind…but also the lesson of patience and perseverance as I am continually faced with the tastiness of ‘crap’. Through it all I remind myself that success will come through simply doing my best, one day at a time. Here’s to being 50 and fabulous for many years to come!

That’s where I am at…stay tuned for Meg’s post later this week as she shares her own journey with food.

First and Foremost….Food

Let’s face it, food is a paradox. There are dozens of different diets out there, each claiming to be the best for us – paleo, keto, vegan, carnivore, Weight Watchers, vegetarian, Atkins, gluten-free, grapefruit, Soylent, low-fat, South Beach, raw fruit, juice cleanses, SlimFast – the list goes on and on…how can we possibly know what’s right? This deluge of diets is utterly overwhelming, the research behind them conflicting, and the followers of them often cult-like in their adamance that x, y or z is the only way to eat. We’ve both found ourselves asking the same question – where is the joy in this?

If you follow a plant-based diet for your health, someone will always have a story of their grandmother who ate bacon and smoked cigarettes every day and lived to the ripe old age of 90-something without any health issues.

Or the friend of a friend who ran marathons, ate super clean and was the picture of health, and dropped dead of a heart attack at 45.

We can’t control our genetics, or what fate has in store for us, but we can be conscious of how we choose to fuel our bodies. Where are the stories of individuals who live life in balance, making healthy choices and yet indulging when it’s about more than just nutrition? The people who eat for the sheer joy of it, without compromising their health on a regular basis?

We chose to focus on food in February because we aspire to be one of these enlightened individuals. We want to eat to nourish ourselves so we live long, vibrant lives, without starving ourselves of the joy that comes from eating pizza with your friends on a Friday night, or a slice of Grandma’s chocolate cake that she made just for you. What joy is there in living a long life if you are constantly making yourself miserable over the battle of “Should I or shouldn’t I?” Being at peace with our choices would be a gift indeed, and it is a goal we’ve deemed worthy of pursuit this month and beyond.

To find joy in the daily rhythms of life is to know that making good choices sets a solid foundation for what’s ahead….and we are both still learning…there is joy in that, too.

In our next blog we will share what we are doing to move in the right direction – the books we’re reading, the foods we’re eating, and the choices we’re making on our journey to more joy and overall health, both physical and mental.

Super Bowl – football or food?

Every year it’s the same – the hype leading up to the Super Bowl and for me my attempts at getting excited about a game I know nothing about nor do I have any real passion to learn. I don’t want to miss out though. What does get me revved up is the idea that I can plan for a special Sunday evening and that the main event is the food – there is so much joy in the anticipation and in the actual experience. I listen to the radio and when I talk to family and friends it is often all about the food. Special chili recipes, nachos, pizza, beer….you name it. Serve me up a bowl of the spiciest, cheesiest chili with a dollop of sour cream and a heap of tortilla chips to scoop. Let the game begin! All the foods you hate to love!

As Meg and I embark on our journey with February’s focus on food – the question I ponder with the Super Bowl behind me for another year – can I experience a healthy version of this annual special event – can it become a ‘Salad Bowl’ worthy of the hype and anticipation I have grown to love? You will hear more about why we decided to focus on food in our next post….perhaps the month ahead will provide the answers I am seeking.

Living a life with intention and the goal of moving forward in a way I can be proud of will prepare me for next years big Sunday soiree. Perhaps I will make the key focus the special people in my life and together the laughs and love will fill us up and we will have real joy, not the momentary joy that a good bowl of potato chips brings. Stay tuned for next years Super Bowl update….the journey is just beginning. Btw – who won the game?